“Your pants are too big”

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March 26, 2010 by 8junebugs

It’s true. McFunkinstyle said it the other day, and it’s true…although those pants weren’t the worst example. Her statement was more welcome than the “Are you losing weight?” question, because the truthful answer to that is “I don’t know. Maybe?”

Or “Probably not,” because my doctor’s office weighed me last week and there was no loss, not even if my clothes and shoes weigh five pounds. Plus? I haven’t been trying to lose weight.

But the response to “Your pants are too big” is easy: “Yeah, they are.”

Here’s the thing — it took my stomach a while to rebound from the California bug. I was eating pretty healthfully before then, but I got serious about it when I got back because I needed my stomach to just NOT HURT. At all. So, the stuff I sometimes eat even though I know it’ll hurt my tummy? Yeah, banned for the foreseeable future. I’m also watching portions really carefully — feeling too full is too close to feeling like I need to throw up. (I mean, it’s never been comfortable and hasn’t been a habit in almost two years now, but the change in perspective has made it a deal-breaker.)

As previously noted, I’m on a mad smoothie kick. This week, I’ve made a smoothie for breakfast every morning.

Which has been awesome, you guys. Seriously. Smoothies kick oatmeal’s ass, and I loves me some oatmeal.

I also got serious about the running, once I felt better and my fitness room opened back up — they closed for a week to paint and replace all the machines (and add a goddamn stair-climber, which I have been eyeing suspiciously). Before the California trip, I hit the milestone of running for the full 30 minutes without slowing to a walk, and I’ve kept that going. I’ve been playing with intervals and working on form and breathing, and it’s going GREAT. I’m still under even a 15-minute mile, but it feels fantastic and I keep getting a little better and a little faster each week.

The running creates a feedback loop with my eating habits. This happens whenever I get on a workout kick — I start preferring “clean” foods that my body processes well and easily turns into fuel. Here’s what a day in my diet looks like right now:

Breakfast: Stupidly thick smoothie with fruit, vanilla soymilk, flaxmeal and/or coconut milk. Coffee (duh), but later and less than usual.

Second breakfast: Whole wheat English muffin with yuppie butter substitute. (Last week I grabbed whole wheat cinnamon raisin by mistake. That was a nice surprise.)

Lunch: Still leftovers, but probably fish + veggies or a giant bowl of fiber-packed homemade soup (bean and bacon, for example). Light string cheese. An apple.

Snack: Dry-roasted, salted almonds (weighed out, because I could eat those suckers nonstop), carrots, or a granola or fig bar.

Likely dinner: Probably fish, chicken, or a turkey burger + veggies. Maybe a red potato, baked with or without butter. /or/ Shrimp tossed with angel hair pasta and Italian dressing. /or/ Salted tuna mixed with sweet white corn (excellent for nights when I have a class). /or/ Chili from the freezer with corn chips crumbled in, or on a baked red potato (small portions required — that chili’s really hot).

Sometimes I just throw stuff in a pan because it sounds (a) yummy and (b) like a good idea based on what I’ve eaten and done that day. Last night after yoga, it was sliced baby bella mushrooms, some Canadian bacon, and fakey eggs with a sprinkle of cheese, started on the stove and set under the broiler.

Sometimes, it’s a burger and fries from a local restaurant. What’s the point of running and being all healthy if you can’t have a burger and fries sometimes?

Dessert: If I’m still hungry, fruit. If I’m not really hungry, a small wedge of dark chocolate. I try not to eat after 8 pm, too, but that’s tricky with classes so I don’t stress about it. If I don’t eat a decent dinner, I can’t run in the morning.

Other stuff sometimes gets added here and there — fruit at a breakfast meeting, cookies from a bake sale, a small bottle of orange juice. There’s just a lot less of that stuff than before, because I’m not really interested.

With all this and yoga once a week (or more) and the two to three liters of water I drink anyway, my body’s changing a bit and my pants are too big…except for the pants that were too small — those fit. Sadly, I went clothes shopping right before this started, but at least the only work pants I bought were part of a new suit, and the suit was a liiiittle tighter than I would normally buy something, so that should be fine. The running pants I bought were a little saggy by the time I put them on again and are saggier still now. If this continues, I’ll have the pants taken in and consider shopping again in the fall. (Not the running pants. Those I’ll probably replace sooner rather than later.)

I’m a little amused to see the changes — historically, my pants-wearing bits don’t shrink much. At my smallest, I still usually wear double-digit sizes to accommodate my French-Canadian ass. Then again, historically, I don’t gain weight in my waist, either. Turning 30 changed the course of my bodily history, I guess.

Which is fine. Gaining a little weight in my waist and losing a little below it should make it a hell of a lot easier to find pants that fit. You know…when I buy new pants.

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