January 21, 2008 by 8junebugs
I’ve been unusually silent for reasons about which I’m going to be unusually vague, because I take to heart Heather B. Armstong’s advice re: blogging about work: BE YE NOT SO STUPID.
I flamingo-ed up. (Red Dwarf fans will recognize that as a cock-up, only much, much bigger.) I made a huge work mistake, an expensive mistake, a mistake the likes of which I would like to avoid for the rest of my working years. The kind of mistake that makes you swallow your tongue, after recommending your own dismissal and offering to swig hemlock on your lunch hour.
Instead of opting for suicide or unemployment, my supervisors and colleagues, including the one whose budget I decimated, protectively looked for ways that it was not entirely on my shoulders. Should so-and-so have caught it? Yes, but no more so than I. Shouldn’t that person have done this another way? Certainly, but that was six months ago and not at the heart of the problem. I’m not an expert on this kind of project…but none of us is, and I’m closest, I guess.
This error came during a week when my dance card looked like the town tramp’s. I had projects coming out of my ears, and none with a deadline past today. In addition to choking on my pride in copping to my screw up, I had to face some pretty vocal unhappy folks who, frankly, didn’t take kindly to being switched to the back burner. These are respected and beloved colleagues under tremendous…albeit, annual…strain.
And I think I held up okay. This is not the first time I have screwed up on the job. This is just epic. My pride, a delicate violet of a thing, is buried under a load of
cowshit mortification, but, in the end, one will nourish the other.
I am a very, very fortunate girl.